It's just one of the things that makes one of the mes chuckle

I always laugh during the farewell scene in Titanic, because for the longest time I heard: 

"Don't say goodbyes, not yet" 

(I missed "your"). 

In Sweden "byes" sounds like bajs and bajs means "poop".

  

#mature #manure #hahahahahahaahaha

All I want for Valentine's.. is Derek's level of self-respect

Roger: Would you mind seeing someone?  
Derek: Who? 
Roger: Well.. an expert; a doctor.
Hannah: You don't have to!
Derek: If I am 'tistisc', was it?
Roger: Autistic!
Derek: Au?
Roger: Tistic.
Derek: That's what I said: 'tistic'. If I am tistic.. will I die? 
Hannah: No. 
Roger: No, but at least we'd know..
Derek: Will I have to go into hospital and do experiments on me?
Both: No.
Derek: So.. would it change me in any way? Would I be the same person?
Hannah: Yes!
Derek: Don't worry about it then.

'twas the best part

- So.. you can pick up their scent, can't you? Track their footprints?
- I was with the Navy, not the Navajo!

Jurassic World

OTIFHCILTB (One True Inspiration For How Carefree I'd Like To Be)

 Solo: [carefully places himself on a sofa, upon realizing he's been drugged]

Victoria: What are you doing?

Solo: I've been here before and last time I fell rather badly and hurt my head..

The Man from U.N.C.L.E

Miguel; my spirit animal..

 

Miguel: We'll follow that trail!

Tulio: What trail?

Miguel: [chopping at vines with sword] The trail that we blaze! 

[the vines fall down revealing a solid wall of rock] 

[long pause]

Miguel: [pointing in another direction] THAT trail that we blaze... 

The Road to El Dorado

Life hack #2

What do you do when nothing cheers you up, because your pollen medicine makes you want to sleep 24/7? You eat ice cream for breakfast, take a super hot shower, snuggle with some form of animal and teach yourself a new quote from the movie you.. already know many quotes from:

You know - there's a big world out there. Filled with desperate orphans who would gladly swim across an ocean of thumbtacks just to be eclipsed by the long shadow that is cast by my accomplishments. But I don't care about them! I chose to open my heart to you two lovely children and your hideous primate. All I ask in return is that you do each and every thing that pops into my head while I enjoy the enourmous fortune your parents left behind.

And then you give in and sleep for 10 hours. You're welcome.

A life with him would never be boring..

Sherlock: That was no accident! It was by design!

[reveals grenade + part of toilet hidden around his waist]

Now, do I need to elaborate or can we just crack on?

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

The Wonderful Life of a Student

You get to feel like:

You've thrown off the Emperor's groove

You've gathered three melons as a private stockpile for the ice age and now all of them have fallen off a cliff

Something's wrong because your eyeballs are stuck all the way inside your head and now they hurt and you'd like to massage them without injuring yourself, but you can't

  

Butter, scraped over too much bread 

Not the king of the world

You don't speak "monkey" 

(even though every book is written solely in "monkey".. why didn't anybody warn you?)

Life hack

When someone (99% of the time it's your sister Sara) turns down a sandwich because "she's not that hungry right now" and then, two minutes later, wants "just a tiiiny bite" from YOURS, just say:

"Hey, if you weren't smart enough to plan ahead, then doom on you!" (and then chant "doom on you" until she walks away (or punches you - it really could go either way..))